$2.58 worth of shit.

It is November. So my expectations were very low to begin with when I purchased this slice of shitass piece of cowshit. But, at the time of purchase I had HOPE. What a fool I am. Hope that someone had flown it in to Bum Fucked Northern Michigan from Argenfuckingtenia just for ME ? Highly fucking doubtful. But, being the Watermelon Man, I had to assume they did. I was wrong. It is mushy, tasteless, bogus shit.
Probably picked in Lousiana from the floating toxic floodwaters of Katrina. At leat thats what it tastes like. But, ya know, I couldn't not buy it.